As my friend and I discussed our worth today, I began to ponder something powerful. We were talking about future spouses and questions arose such as: 

What if they never show up?

What if I never find them?

What if I am made to be alone, like Paul?

Not that I think God has called my friend to a lifetime of singleness, but I asked him if God would be enough for him if that were the case. His response was that if he were to not have a future spouse, he would do it if that were God’s Will, but it’d be a very serious question of obedience… the test of all tests. 

After this conversation, I really got to thinking… Does my ‘God, You are enough for me,’ have a ‘but’ after it? If I omitted all the Sunday School church answers, removed any sugar coating, and answered that honestly, would it be enough? 

We sing songs that say, “You can have all this world, but give me Jesus.” What if the world were taken away from you? If the things you cherished and desired the most were taken away, would God still be enough? You see, any Christian truly trying to seek God’s Will would want to answer YES as fast as they can, but I don’t know if that would even be a genuine response most times.

We sing songs that say, “There’s nothing I desire that can’t be found in You. You’re everything that I’ve ever needed, just give me Jesus.” But when we are struggling with infertility, losing a loved one, getting laid off, in an unrelenting season of waiting, or even worse, an unwavering season of storms, is Jesus enough? 

I remember my face to the floor pleading for God to heal my heart, and while healing is so important, I was also begging for Him to give me the desires of my heart. A lot of the yearnings I had did not line up with God’s will, and if I had gotten what I wanted, I can tell you right now, I wouldn’t be a worship leader. 

The Bible says in Psalms 37:4, “Delight yourself in the LORD, and He will give you the desires of your heart.”

I hear this all the time, and it’s quite often misused. We read the second half of this verse excitedly anticipating the ways God is going to give us what we want. 

“I know that God is going to give me four babies because that’s my desire”

But what if God wants your full attention to be on children who had no parents and grew up never feeling love a single day in their life?

“I know that God is going to bless my finances and make me rich because that’s my heart’s desire”

But what if God needs you to struggle in order to have the wisdom to later teach finance classes in church? 

“I know that God is going to move this mountain out of my way because it’s hard and I’m struggling. My desire is to not go through this anymore.”

But what if God made this mountain to be climbed rather than to be moved, for it is at the end of the climb where we can see our next destination. 

The first half of that bible verse says to delight yourself in the Lord. That means finding fulfillment completely in him; it’s finding our satisfaction and worth in Christ, for our focus to be on Him and His Will for our lives. The idea isn’t that God gives us a brand-new car and the dream life we picture, it’s when we truly rejoice and delight ourselves in the eternal things of God, our desires begin to parallel His Will and line up with His Will. 

When we have a hunger for the Will of God, He gives us our desires, because ultimately our desires end up being what He has for us if we are chasing what we ought to. 

Today, if God gave you the desires of your heart, would they line up with your will or His? 

This is just some food for thought; and don’t get me wrong I think it’s a great thing to have dreams, wants, and hopes, but I also think that as we fixate on Jesus, some of those desires begin to change. 

For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. I will be found by you,” says the Lord. “I will end your captivity and restore your fortunes. I will gather you out of the nations where I sent you and will bring you home again to your own land.”

Jeremiah 29:11-14